The Working Parent's Guide to Quality Time
By Sarah Stirling
Motherhood redefines guilt like few other experiences. As a motherhood and parent coach, I’ve seen it firsthand—with both myself and with my clients—the constant tug-of-war between family life and professional demands. We’re told we can "have it all" and celebrated as "superwomen" (or men) for juggling work, family, and more. Yet, this pressure often leaves us feeling stretched thin and guilty—whether we’re working to support our families or pursuing a career we love.
When family time is compressed into evenings and weekends, how can you ensure it's high quality? Here are three recommendations to make the most of your limited time together:
1. Be present. Quality time beats quantity time, any day of the week. Being fully present, even for a focused 15 minutes daily can transform your relationship. Are you calm, engaged, and curious with your child, or are you preoccupied and stressed? To shift gears after work, try building in an intentional transition—like deep breathing or listening to a favorite song—before you dive into family time. It costs nothing, takes just a few minutes, and helps you leave the day’s stress behind.
2. Separate "mothering" from household management. "Mothering" is the time spent playing or caring for your child, while tasks like cleaning, cooking, packing lunches, and running errands fall under household management. The mental load is overwhelming, distracting, and a common block to being present. To reclaim time for your child, consider outsourcing where possible. Can groceries be delivered? Could you hire local help for tidying or meal prep once a week? What responsibilities could you share with your partner or ask friends and extended family to help with? Small changes can make a big difference in freeing up quality family time.
3. Choose childcare with transparent communication. You might be away from your little one throughout the day, but that doesn’t mean you have to miss out. Look for childcare options that prioritize transparency and keep you connected. Many centers offer parent communication systems—like Apple's daily updates and messaging features via Procare—that provide real-time insights into your child's activities, meals, and mood. These tools help you stay connected while you’re out there doing what you need or love to do, and leave you feeling reassured that your little one is in good hands.
Balancing work and parenthood is difficult, and it’s easy to let guilt creep in from all sides. But remember, striving for balance is a journey. By being present, easing your mental load, and finding childcare solutions that keep you connected with your child's day, you optimize the precious hours you have together and create meaningful moments that deepen your family bonds.
You're doing your best—and that's more than enough.
A mom of two, certified parent and motherhood coach, and full-time professional, Sarah Stirling works with parents of young children to break generational cycles, move away from punishment-based parenting, and cultivate self-compassion — supporting parents in reshaping their parenting journey to create a more connected, intentional family life. You can reserve a free, 20-minute strategy session here.
